Praying for a miracle

The next day was one of the longest days ever. It's amazing how slow time can pass when we are anxiously wanting it to go quickly. Today we would find out if our HCG numbers were high enough and if our pregnancy would continue or not.  I consciously worked on being more positive and having more faith. It wasn't easy and I still struggled to dare hope, but I tried. I did meditation, read scriptures, listened to motivational religious talks that have helped me before and I made myself put one foot in front of the other and said I only had to get through this day, tomorrow would be another day. That night we went to a support group that we lead for addiction recovery. The people there are great and working hard to overcome their constant struggles and we have so much love and respect for them. We felt so inspired and uplifted there and it really helped me to focus on others and not my own struggle as much. Afterward, I visited for a while with a good friend who needed extra encouragement and advice. That conversation probably helped me even more than her as I realized the tender mercy for me to help someone else, which helped me even more. I'm always happiest when I'm helping others so it was a gift to be able to help someone that night and get beyond my own trial. I'm so grateful to my friend who was there for me that night. 

I didn't sleep well that night knowing we would get up at 5:00a to head up north 2 hours for my blood draw, then we were flying to NY at 9 that morning for a fundraiser event. This time we didn't have time to wait for the results, so would have to wait until we got to NY to find out later that afternoon. Justin fasted that day and I poured my heart out most of the 2 hour ride up pleading for Heavenly Father to provide a miracle, but willing to accept His will for us and just asked that He help us through it either way. I was back to having peace in my heart for whatever outcome and knew it was in His hands. It was a long flight to NY and we wanted to wait until we got to our hotel room to learn the results. Since, I have the ability to look up the results online (which is a blessing AND a curse) so we said another prayer and got comfortable as we looked up the results online. 

We needed a 300 or higher for our HCG. We said another prayer and looked up the results. It was so nerve racking and I think Justin and I were both prepared for bad news, yet hoping and praying to see 300 or higher. We settled in and got comfortable and looked up the website. As the page slowly loaded, there it was...our latest HGC results...410!!!!! 410!!!! We couldn't believe it!!! We thought we were emotional and excited Monday when we found out we were pregnant, but this time was so much higher on our emotions!!! Wow! We more than doubled and we were back on track! We immediately recognized the miracle and blessing that had just occurred as I really believe I was in the process of miscarrying and that through prayer, fasting (our own as well as so many family and friends) and Heavenly Father's love and mercy that we were able to continue on and get back on track with the pregnancy. We were both in tears and on cloud 9, with shock and gratitude. Right away we knelt in prayer to thank our Father for the blessing and miracle that had just taken place. We once again became firm believers in miracles, blessings, fasting and prayers. We spent the rest of the night with permanent smiles and updating family and friends who were also bracing themselves for the news. I wonder if Heavenly Father is wanting to remind us that he can give, and also take away (like with Job) and that this pregnancy we need to be extra close to Him as we continue on with this miracle. Making sure we are earnestly praying, fasting and pouring out our hearts to him as we await each result and monitoring appointment along the way.